Wednesday, 31 March 2010
Easter really sneaked up on me this year. I mean, I'd seen the ten foot tall inflatable Easter bunny at New World supermarket, and I'd eaten some hot cross buns last weekend, but I hadn't given Easter much thought after that.
When life is treating me well, Easter is easy to ignore. Right now life is treating me very well.
Yesterday I woke up, drank peppermint tea and read Hemingway. Then Dan and I ran down to the beach and jumped into the sea. We swam against a background of volcanic islands and palm trees. We walked back up to the house, barefoot and soaking. We made coffee and I wrote all day. If this isn't life treating me well, then I don't know what is.
But even when my house is in order, when my finances, my emotions and my relationships are all ticking away nicely, I need to pay Easter some respect. I've got to tip my hat to this holiday I know I'm indebted to.
Easter comes along, if quietly and on tip toes, and reminds me of the 29 other Easters I've lived. Easters when I wasn't sipping coffee on the beach in New Zealand, when my house felt anything but in order. I think of years when Easter was really stretching, because of difficult relationship scenarios, because of a train wreck that crashed into my faith and worldview, because of fear, guilt, doubt and all of those other things that happen to humans.
As a human of faith, specifically of the Christian variety, Easter is my backbone. In the Christian calendar, it's the holiday that celebrates Jesus' resurrection. It resonates with me, because I'm all about resurrection. Easter reminds me that I believe in a God who says, "Give me the worst you've got. Give me the places you feel death. I'm going to go ahead and turn all that into life." This resurrection belief is one I've clung to through many long Good Fridays of the soul, waiting for the relief of Easter Sunday.
I am so grateful that right now I don't feel like I'm hanging on desperately to a resurrection God. But Easter is my yearly reminder that I have felt this - I've hung on with white knuckles - and that I may again. And that whether I feel it or not, my identity revolves around a resurrection. I'm grateful to have a God who doesn't let me drown in desperation, but drip feeds me hope when I need it.
Easter may humbly try and sneak by unnoticed, but I'm not going to let it. I hope everyone has a lovely holiday with friends and family and that you may all know the grace of resurrection in your lives this year as well.
Posted by alisha at 23:25