Imperfectionista in Britain

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Britain's got a big election coming up (May 6) and, while I can't vote, I will be backing Britain with a big shout out. Not a political one, just a wee praise.

When I left five months ago I was, like someone ready to leave, highly attuned to the UK's faults. But now, after some distance, I'm coming to terms with England. I'm thinking about the things the UK does well and the things I'd like to smuggle back into the States with me in a month.

One of the UK's strengths is the ability to be comfortable with imperfection. This might seem like a backhanded compliment, but I'm serious – I loved how much less pressure there is in the UK to be perfect.

I'd been thinking about this for a while, but two blog posts this week hoisted imperfection to the top of my mind. One was a post from an American in Britain on She's Not from Yorkshire about the English and the (real) female body and the other was from Rachel Held Evans on how perfectionism kills community. They got me thinking.


Sometimes I'd tell this to my British friends, how the drive to perfection is fainter there, how people just aren't as bothered trying to attain unreasonable standards, and they'd defend their country, "No, we feel it here too." And I'm thinking about several 'type A' Brits that silently defy my generalizations as I write. But still, I contend that as a culture, the disease of perfectionism is much fainter in the UK. America breeds it. It pushes you there.

As a recovering perfectionist, I don't want to bash current perfectionists when I label it a disease. Because I think the same ambition that fuels perfectionism also fuels excellence. Ambition is a double-edged sword. It's what makes American customer service impeccable and mediocrity a market failure. It's what makes an American baby shower as much of an event as a British wedding. It keeps teeth white and skin tanned and the self-improvement industry in full swing. I like the ambition of America, but sometimes, it can be a bit too much.

Trying to be perfect all the time can be exhausting. And a waste of time.

While the UK is an ambitious culture as well, it has more well-defined boundaries. Instead of crippling its population with unrealistic ideals, it's more accepting of the imperfect. I think British culture even takes special joy in the imperfect. Expectations are less airbrushed and there's a common understanding that, of course you're not perfect, you're human. Have a bit of a tummy? Good, you're enjoying life.

The UK is a great place to get over perfectionism - it certainly helped me kick the habit. And for that, I'm backing Britain today.

What do you guys think? Americans, do you think our culture places unrealistic expectations on people? Brits, do you agree?

{Photo from flickr Peter Denton}